It's early in the morning and I have the worstest headache. I'm super stressed out and trying to handle everything with tact but it's not working out so easily. I've been having major anxiety over silly things which I'm trying to correct my thought processes but it seems a bit more complex then I was hoping. Happiness is in my grasp and at my finger tips even with all the crazy stuff that's going on. I sometimes wonder if I have the anxiety just because I haven't lived a "normal" life and that there's part of me that is about to do anything it takes to have that chaos back. T's going to alanon alot and it makes me think about when I used to go and how in order for me to start making a change for the better I had to let go of my insecurities of being healthy and happy. Life is hard but man oh man is it ever good too. I need to start making forward strides and I know that as hard as it is to wade through this swampy feeling that on the other side of all this is all the rainbows and sunshine I've been craving. I know that my life is never going to be perfect. And I truly don't want it to be. I want to continue growing and I know that in order for me to grow I have to endure growing pains. That's life. I'm just setting out to have more ups then downs. 2008 is gonna be a gooder I think.
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