FFS EFFING FRENCH

so turns out abs got me one of my favorite designer`s bags how excited am i? pretty damn excited. she and her family always get me the best shiz for xmas. I`m totally not a designer kinda person. I just finished reading lojo`s blog about purses and i have to admit I totally agree with her. I too have an onslaught of bags of bestfriendies past. and one would assume that since i can make bags i`d be the bag diva, but alas i am not because i hate my own things, i`d rather use something someone else made. my girl friend made me the coolest bag with a tie as a strap and fun fur on the inside. i love that bag dearly and even though it`s all falling apart from over use i still have it and love it. i can`t part with it. just as i can`t part with any bag before or after. i`ll always tell myself some silly reason to keep it around. i do the same thing with tshirts...i don`t get it.

in other news i got a raise and a permanent position on my unit of dual diagnosis. (mental illness and addiction) which means benefits, and pension and more/guaranteed hours SW00T! I am so friggin happy.

i also have come to the conclusion that i dont like the keyboard at work there for i don't blog. so my fix for that will to bring my lappy top to work and type out stuff on word then post it when i get home so you can keep up with my rapid thoughts


ps i get to go see screeching weasel soon!

ppss my stupid computertron is back in french for ffs I CANT EVEN MAKE ANGRY FACE CUZ ITS IN EFFIN FRENCH!!!! GAH!!!!! im so frèaking mad i tell it we are in mexico and it still goes into french mode i dont gÈt it!

So I found out what my awesome lil Abs is getting me for Christmas. Now I don't usually gush over girly things like handbags, yes I do enjoy a good bag and love making them but I do not enjoy spending an over priced amount on any one brand and yeah I usually just find whatever works for slinging over the shoulder. But on this particular occasion I was quite excited.....I'm getting a Betsy Johnson Bag!!!

painting

I need to come up with some seriously awesome ideas of things to paint any suggestions?

I need to put up my christmas tree and lights.....any cute boys wanna help me with the lights?

and I need to do a kartwheel....off i go!

running through my head but not with scissors luckily

I can still remember
The words and what they meant
As we etched them with our fingers
In years of wet cement
The days blurred into each other
Though everything seemed clear
We cruised along at half speed
But then we shifted gears

We ran like vampires from a thousand burning sons
But even then we should have stayed
But we ran away
Now all my friends gone
Maybe we’ve outgrown all the things that we once loved
Runaway
But what are we running from ?
A show of hands from those in this audience of one
Where have they gone ?

Identities assume us
As nine and five add up
Synchronizing watches
To the seconds that we lost
I looked up and saw you
I know that you saw me
We froze but for a moment
In empathy

I brought down the sky for you but all you did was shrug
You gave my emptiness away

But you ranaway
Now all my friends gone
Maybe we’ve outgrown all the things that we once loved
Runaway
But what are we running from ?
A show of hands from those in this audience of one
Where have they gone ?

We’re all ok, until the day we’re not
The surface shines, while the inside rots
We raced the sunset and we almost won
We slammed the brakes, but the wheels went on

We ran away
Now all my friends gone
Maybe we’ve outgrown all the things that we once loved
Runaway
But what are we running from ?
A show of hands from those in this audience of one
Where have they gone ?


I'm so conflicted with thoughts today, go here no go there, fix this no don't it's not worth it, move forward but i can't quit looking back in hope or shattered dreams?. my body wants one thing my mind another and my heart just isn't where either of the first mentioned two are. Fawk I'm so mad at you for choosing for us and on the other hand if you didn't i'm not sure what would happen other wise. I know you care what i think or you wouldn't have ran it past me first, even if it was to let me know before you jumped. For foxcreek. Why do I care so bloody much. oh yeah, cuz i'm me.....i know this does not make any sense, and maybe that's the point, it's not even really making sense to me today. it was in my head and i had to get it out. I know that you all read this loyally and usually i write for you but this little rant was just for me. Tomorrow will be fine, i'll be back on track and things working tickity boo.

Hot nurses

aren't so bad are they?

I haven't been blogging a lot because I haven`t done a whole lot. I`ve been sick and back again on antibiotics. I`m getting tired of being on them. I got the h1n1 shot over 10 days ago so it better not be the h1n1. I haven`t felt well since I got the shot. I`m not a doctor and not a nurse, but if I was in a normal job I wouldn`t get the shot. I think there`s something really odd about how fast they pushed it onto us. I had a friend who had a reaction to it and most of the people that I know that have gotten it haven`t felt that great after getting it.

And what do ya know my computer keeps going into french...ffs. It`s so annoying how it randomly changes without notice. Anyways hopefully it will get more interesting soon I`m getting bored in my own life and that`s kinda weird.

I've been sick for the last week. I tried to go to work the other day but that didn't work out. As I was sitting waiting for my mom to pick me up I sat in the front reception of the hospital where I work and had something interesting happen.

thanks Dmaster, good thing we gotz it figured out .....

Narwhals

up and running?

so halloween came and went, it was actually really tough for me because it was the first halloween in 5 years that I didn't take abs trick or treating. it's not the worst thing in the world but when you figure i prolly only have another 2-3 years tops to take her out every year counts. but i had to work and without a roomate to help subsidise the rent (still have a hole in the wall to fix in the room that i'm renting go figure people don't like to rent a room with a hole in it, but they're happy with a hole aka a window?) i have to work all the shifts i can. which as of late has been 6 a week with an over time in there some where. *sigh*

so i didn't get to go out, i didn't get to wear the cthulhu costume i made, and yeah it sucked. it's my favorite day of the year and i spent it pretty much like all my other days but in a unicorn jacket, but honestly i wear that every so often just around the house. meh.

i just re applied for my job, if you don't know the story about the shamawz also known as my line at work, don't worry, you're lucky you haven't been victim to the subject. long story short i've interviewed for my position a few times now, and hopefully this is the last one. so keep your fingers crossed for me kiddies, my interview is on the 10th. sw00t.

speaking of work, i got my h1n1 shot, not before the flames, but prolly before most of the public. i wasn't going to get it originally, and honestly i don't think i needed to, i don't get sick. norwalk ran rampant through all the hospital last year and i didn't get it, my whole family has h1n1 but me, i just don't get it. but since i'm a health care worker i figured maybe i would, but i'm not getting the flu shot, although i am thinking about calling in autistic tomorrow since apparently that's the side effect from this puppy, not to mention my sore arm and yuck feeling.

i haven't been writing much because i haven't been able to concentrate on a whole lot lately. as most of you know i've been on a harsh regiment of antibiotics, and well as most of you know they throw me into a pretty heavy downward spiral, and the last thing i can do is come up with sentences to say or respond with let alone blog. but i'm feeling better finally. and things are looking up.

madd props go to all my friends for helping out with this, (Bosman,Dall, Pickles, amy kim, lancey, brenty, Dmaster, my work friends, the GSO(thanks for helping around my house) and) :AN for being so awesome and spoiling me rotten with dvds comics and a plant of daisies.

well i'll do my best to blog more this month but that shouldn't be a problem. but i'm off to bed i'm wiped. nighty night