purging

why do i get so scared with somethings. change is good, i live for change, i'm constantly hitting the reset button. but lately it seems i'm doing so with less vigor. not really a bad thing, i think i'm mellowing out a ton in my "old age". i'm making more realistic decisions and planning for a great future, but not holding any expectations. but somethings are just hard to do. i cleaned out half of my basement and while it felt so good to get rid of so much stuff i don't need it was hard to part with some of the stuff that brought back memories, good, bad, ugly, unforgettable, beautiful and just plain ol' moments in time once spent with those loved, lost, hated, and inspired. with each item i physically touched, a memory so vivid came flooding back. it was the cheapest form of therapy you could ask for. but was i ready? i think i was ready a long time ago and just didn't have the insight to see i was. this year is still shaping up better then i could have imagined, and i know that with all the people who love me so much and i love them, it's going to be amazing. thanks for helping me with the basement mom. i couldn't have done it without you.