I hate this part. The part that hurts so much but you know it's the kind of hurt that is going to make you stronger, like when you're training your body to run. I know I just have to break through the wall and drop all the weight that's holding me back. I've made the first steps, now I just have to keep pushing through. I'm so lucky to have the people in my life that I do. I don't think I've had to be alone for one whole day since all this went down. I've had great people take me for dinner every night and play video games with me, I get bed time phone calls from oscar winners who tell me bed time stories and tell me I'm beautiful before I fall asleep. I have the greatest girl who's been coaching me from experience the entire way, reminding me to focus and keeping me on track. I have a great counselor who keeps giving me home work that causes me to reflect on where I'm at and why things happen and how to change them for the better. And I have the greatest co workers who are super supportive and I really do love my job. I'm scared what's going to happen in the next year but I know even though I feel alone at times I really really really am not. Thanks Dars, J, Bear, JJ&S, Bosman and Mar, Arcturis and Wright, Wheelleg, SA'00'R, and the JarisRod and sarah pickles.