blup libble lop

so I went to my favorite website to purchase a new wallet because I'm desprately trying to get rid of my current one. It's funny everyone compliments me on it but I think it's bum ugly and can't wait to get my cute new one. I went to check my items out paid got it all sorted. Then realized I didn't pick which style of wallet I wanted. So I plugged in my ref# and nothing. So I'm not sure if I even ordered a wallet or not but it is through UPS so I should be able to find out soon.

I'm just on my way out the door to see HIM with Ashley. (for all you old people like myself it's a band. Him is the name of the band which is really them?) So kurfluffery. See you laters skaters I'll let you know how it turns out. Oh and I'm almost done knitting one of my christmas presents to people. One done 104983493 to go.... just kidding.

tricks and treats. (mostly treats)

tricks and treats. (mostly treats)

So I have been reading this book lately that's got me really optomistic about being able to go off my medication and try something new. I really am excited about the prospect of being off all those drugs and still being able to live a normal healthy

when I grow up I want to be a rainbow

I think all the rain and sunshine that are us, I'll be able to
come out a rainbow after all, nothing beats the shiny warm
feeling of forhead kisses. <3

Why are there so many songs about rainbows
And what's on the other side?
Rainbows are visions, but only illusions,
And rainbows have nothing to hide.
So we've been told and some choose to believe it
I know they're wrong, wait and see.
Someday we'll find it, the rainbow connection,
The lovers, the dreamers and me.

Who said that every wish would be heard and answered
when wished on the morning star?
Somebody thought of that
and someone believed it,
and look what it's done so far.
What's so amazing that keeps us stargazing?
And what do we think we might see?
Someday we'll find it, the rainbow connection, the lovers, the dreamers and me. All of us under its spell, we know that it's probably magic....

Have you been half asleep
and have you heard voices?
I've heard them calling my name.
Is this the sweet sound that calls the young sailors?
The voice might be one and the same.
I've heard it too many times to ignore it.
It's something that I'm supposed to be.
Someday we'll find it, the rainbow connection,
the lovers, the dreamers and me.
La, la la, La, la la la, La Laa, la la, La, La la laaaaaaa

Nothing is ever good enough it seems. I go out of my way to express how crappy I felt about myself to him and he doesn't even listen to that all he want

ate some super awesome yummy stroganoff today thanks to my wicked awesome cousin Ashley. She's good to me. We're going to see Him. on Wed. Should be good times. The last time we went to a concert we went to the Backstreet Boys. *cough cough* yeah it was a while back...anyways, I get to go for dinner at they're house tomorrow for chicken curry. MMMMMmmmMMMmmmm. What else. I watch this super awesome documentary on this insane couple who love each other in the most demented but real way. The film was called Crazy Love. It was a big story in the 50's and 70's. Horrific but touching and somewhat understanding yet unbelievable. Anyways I'm off to watch some movies and make a lil something something for a super cute guy that I'm madly in Love with.

nadda ladda much

it's 5am and I'm constantly waking up and not being able to sleep. My whole house is covered in plastic like a bad version of E.T. when the house is turned into a lab. That was so scary for me as a kid. It reeeeeeks of paint. Last night I was so violently ill from a combination of heat/dehydration/fumes/being suffocated with plastic all over/too many endorphins being released in my bwains! A super cute boy came over and saved me from the terrible fate of the ceiling fan. Gosh I thought that thing was never going to get out of the ceiling. I am forever in debted to him for it. I tried to convince a few friends to help me with that but the only thing that ever came out of anyone for that was the grand idea of my dads: make a plank using the ledge and a ladder, put a chair on that, have my little sister who's very much not little in hight stand on the chair while my mom or I hold a pole for her to use as balance and she either remove the fan or drape it in plastic????? all the while little ping pang runs with a spinning plate on the pole singing a circus song....seriously wtf....and not weasel taffy fluff either. Oh well he meant well. I just don't think it was thought through completely.

I talked to M tonight on msn and it really got me pissed off. I try not to let him know things bug me but tonight I couldn't help lay into him about stuff. I think the thing that bothered me the most is the lies he told his friends and family about me. Like that we weren't together when he was living with me. Sometimes I wonder if it has to do with the fact that I had placed my daughter for adoption while the other side of me thinks it's because he wasn't honest about why he moved to Calgary to be with me. Oh well what's done is done. I need to listen to Patrick and Brent and forget about it and move on. I just get so emotional about that stuff.

I haven't talked to Shane in a while. I miss ya dude. We should go to a movie or something since you keep mentioning the lack of movie-age in your diet. Any suggestions folks?

I still have to put up picks from Halloween. I'll get to it once I can stop getting high as I walk up stairs, where I then don't have a clue as to what I was going up there for. Man those paint fumes are killer!