Just a titch of an update

 Well things haven't really improved on my eating. I'm still only able to keep down 5% of what I eat so I'm relying on Boost Protein and Protein Shakes to get my nutrition. It's frustrating because I've been trying to talk to my Dr and my nurse and they just keep putting me off until June and July. So frustrating. I still have a bump on my noggin but the scar looks decent now. I don't think the bump is ever going to go down. 

In other news Iwent for the first camp of the year to Miquelon Lake. It was still considered winter camping so an electrical site was only 25.00. It was so beautiful out and the temp was decent at 16-22C out during the day and 2C at night. I went on an adventure to get firewood from this dude appropriately called MORNING WOOD near sherwood park. The amount of wood I got was stellar but the wood when I tried to burn it seemed to have a. lot of moisture which sucked. One of the pieces even had mushroom mould on it. Maybe later in the year it would  be better? 

Big changes for me at work lately. The only two full time positions they have are the two night lines. Leona and I. Well Leona decided she's going casual so I got a new partner Kyle. He's cool. But it's weird not working with Leona all of the time. We were partners for 5 years.Then my Program Manager emailed us that she's leaving which will leave a hole for me as I really looked up to her. The only thing guaranteed is change, death and taxes. 

Abs also spent a week with me which while that seems long it never seems long enough for me. I just love that mini one so much. We went mad crazy making baubles for upcoming markets this year.

You oughta see the ninja polar bear that tried to attack me!

 Wow who would have thought I'd still be on a liquid diet. Not me that's for sure. I've been having trouble with fainting the last couple of months the other day being the worst. I had the kindest skip driver ask me if I was ok and if my bf had done this to me and if I was safe. He told me he would contact the police if I was too scared. I assured him I had a fainting spell and landed my face on the floor and there was no need for concern but I apprecited his worry. I ended up with 5 stitches and a black eye. I also landed myself in the hospital for two days because my ECG's were all wonky showing I had a stroke or a heart attack but my blood work markers showed I was fine. 

On my days off I decided to work on an Alice in wonderland car quilt for my mom for her trip to get her hip replaced FINALLY!. I got the cutest jelly rolls of fabric for it. Jelly rolls are 2.5" wide long strips of fabric pre cut to make quits or runners. I'm so excited to see how it turns out. 

I also signed up for a rug making class out of old t shirts and stretchy fabric.  As well as a serger class so I can finally unpack my serger and thread it properly and use it. I've been so afraid of it for some reason even though I know how to surge from fashion design school. I just don't know how to thread it and that's been my main stressor. This class uses the same surger and teaches you how to thread them so I'm excited to learn and master this skill. 

I'm disappointed that I can't go see Abs today. My head just hurts too much and I have trouble seeing out of my left eye so I shouldn't drive down to Calgary to.see her. But I so badly want to see her new place and hug her. I miss her so much. It's been too long since we've seen each other. ( Christmas) 

Otherwise nothing is new. I'm so boring. I'm just looking forward to going to 'a little get together' may long. I got a new camping chair since mine is on the fritz. It's not as nice as my last one but its [ur[le my favourite colour besides rainbow, and has a spot for my drink and my phone which will be nice when I'm camping solo. I can't wait to dance to happy hardcore at night and see all my friends. Who knows maybe I'll meet someone or some new friends. I have all my clips and handi ready to go from last years wind down party that I didn't get to go to. I have two hats too, my feral racoon Dino hat and my big ol' safari type hat. I'm so pumped for this festival. I really should go to another one too but this year I'm just focusing on camping trips. Crimson lake is a spot we're going to and of course I'm heading to wizard lake. I can't wait to kayak again. 

47 is a rough goat

 It's been a month now since my surgery and I've had such a horrible time with healing. I ended up back in the hospital (Edmonton) because I can't keep even liquids down. Turns out the entrance to my small intestine is tightened by scar tissue built up around the stomach causing fluids to not pass quickly. I'm supposed to be on a solid diet now but I'm stuck still at a liquid diet. This is so frustrating. I'm constantly nauseous from the build up in my stomach not passing through to my lower intestine. I'm now off until the 11th and maybe longer if I have to have another surgery to fix this. I find out more answers this week. Sheesh this turning 47 hasn't been easy I tell ya. And because of the nausea I can't stop sweating. It's like menopause all over again. Yuck. I'll keep you up dated on how things go next week in Red Deer. Luckily I'm down 30lbs! So that's a win!

Painful Reminder

     This surgery was so painful. I don't think it's still supposed to hurt so much. I had to have a drain installed because they flubbed up and I bled into my stomach. Thus a drain had to be put in. It's the spot where the drain was that's so painful. I finally have enough time to catch up on things like my craft show items and cleaning of my bedroom (yes at 47 I still have clothes on my floor) but I hurt too much to do any of it. Here's to hoping I feel better tomorrow.

    But as for the song title I still love that song by SNFU check it out if you want PAINFUL REMINDER by SNFU Ken Chen aka Mr. Chi Pig looks so old in this video but that's him living and thriving on stage. He was such a grand performer. I loved all of his shows I went to. I even got a spy glass from one of the shows. And the last show I went to see the famous Mr. Chi Pig was out side asking people for spare change. No one had seen him for a while and he looked old and like he hadn't had a shower in a while along with missing teeth from his meth use. People shoved him off and ignored him. I asked him if he has puppets for this show and wigs. He knew I knew who he really was. And with that he pulled me out of the long line waiting for tickets at the door. Told everyone "shows sold out you fucking fuckers who needs any of you anyways" and away we went into the club to watch his amazing performances on stage. It was such a great night. 

as the bouncing souls sing "here we go here we go here we go"!

 This is me at 238lbs March 6th 2025 I'll fluctuate between 220-248lbs for almost a year later. But on my birthday I did a huge thing. I got a gastric bypass for weight loss. I know some people think it's cheating to get surgery to lose weight and I know at one point in my weight loss journey I felt that way too. But after 5 years of working out, changing my eating completely and going to therapy I realized it might be the only answer I have. At 260lbs (my heaviest) I tried ozempic which worked great I got down to 198lbs but I couldn't afford to pay out of pocket for it being $250.00 a week, I was heart broken. I was pleased not to gain all the weight back but disappointed none the less. I worked with a trainer, I defied my surgeon who operated on my arm when I had flesh eating disease and did 5 push ups. I felt strong but my weight wasn't moving. I kept up with my healthy eating and cut booze out for the most part. I worked out 4 days a week minimum. Got another trainer when I lost touch of my other trainer. I keep getting stronger and hitting goals that aren't weight related but that effing scale won't move past 220lbs. So after a 5 year wait list I asked my doctor if we could put me on the Red Deer wait list for surgery. She was on board with me and told me not to expect to get picked up quickly and I was ok with that. But the next day Red Deer called and I started my journey to get surgery done. I went to classes, followed strict diets given by dieticians had therapy sessions with a psychologist and was followed by a dr and nurse for a year. Finally after a year of working on myself even further I  got my call that my surgery date was January 28th 2026. Best birthday present to myself I tell ya. So last Wednesday on my 47th birthday I went under and did a life changing thing. I'm so excited to see how this year is going to turn out. I'm doing this so I can have a long healthy life with my daughter who is 21 now and wants to go on hikes and loves camping as much as I do. I want to keep up with her. And here I go to do so......

Art Spot 100

 I'm heading to an art show where everything is under $100.00 I was hoping to enter it myself but I didn't have enough time to put together a large piece which was required. So this will be a next year goal for sure. https://www.under100artshow.com/ check it out! 

I moved my sewing studio into my second bedroom again and love it. I know having money coming in with a roommate would be ideal but I also love living on my own and having my own space. Especially with my sewing room. I can't wait to see what I create in 2025. It's going to be a good year I think. 2024 was pretty epic with moving into my dream apartment and going camping so often this summer and my wild trip to BC and back in a day. And hanging out with Dmaster again. I've done a lot of self discovery this year and am really putting my intentions in a direction that I'm striving for. I think 2025 will be the year I see it all come together. 

womp. womp.

Well it's Sept 3 and my store isn't up yet. I have trouble with the purchase part. Hopefully the kinks will get worked out soon. It's really frustrating but I guess this is what they call growing pains. 

Just about to head out to bass camp so I guess this is just going to have to wait. 

lacedwithk.com

 I'm actually doing it! I'm going to have lacedwithk.com up and running sept 1st and I can't wait! I mean yeah I can because I have so much to do before it's ready to launch but I'm excited to have my products out for others to buy and enjoy. I'll have 28 totes, 20 zippered pouches and about 10 key wristlets. Not a lot but it will be a good start. I started with a 7 dollar store but it isn't what I wanted so I bought the 50.00 one and I'll see if it works out or not. If it's not worth it then I can always go back to the 7 dollar one or maybe try selling on Amazon. I'd just like to keep it all home made including my selling and not use a big company like Amazon but that would also be pretty cool to sell my stuff there and make some bank. Any ways I just want people to love my creations as much as my creations love them. 

This Blog needs C level CPR

I keep trying to rejuvinate this blog and it seems it needs CPR. Oh man. It's like 4 am normal time for me to be awake right! (Don't you dare think that's a real question lol) Things have been so crazy yet totally still for the last little while. I'm struggling to force myself to go back to school. I'm topped out with the education I have in health care. Time to do something different. Unfortunately that means going back to school. I'm thinking OH&S not that I'm super interested in it. Maybe I need something I'm not super passionate about. Just go in--->do my best job----->go home and not think about work. Yet I'm still helping people. I've learned over the years not to bring work home but I still wonder about clients I've seen and how they are doing, hoping the best for them. I don't lose sleep over any of it but I do wonder. 

Time for a new chapter though...I need to grow and NOT MOVE but move in a direction that is up not linear. 

Other things...I moved to the north end of Edmonton which isn't a regular thing for folks moving up do. I really do love my area though. Ideally I'd have a barn style Carriage home with a studio in one of the Garage slots

I'd love to be there in the middle of no where but still have internets. Sew all day and love life. Who knows if I actually push my way into school and make more monies I could do this. 

Also I miss my all time lists at new years.....smarten the fuck up Agent EE and get blogging so we can make a a new one. 

Hey weird thing happened yesterday. I was walking in the lobby of my new place going home from work when I run into STU! Stu lived in my building with my neighbourisjacked in Leduc. They were room mates. Now we live in the same fancy pants building together again! Freaky Deeky! I love it. 

 Abby had A Bee!

I wanna talk about me myself and I

 Well the mini one is about to join the world of the tattoo'd tomorrow. I can't wait to see my girl JenDanger and experience with this with my mini one. She's frigging 19yrs old now! How is this possible?

I'll post photos tomorrow, I think I'm going to start blogging more again. It really helps me personally. I love being able to go back and read what had been going on. If no one reads this that's ok too. I just want to do this for me. 

This is still a thing

 My life’s got flipped turned upside down. 

I work at a drug treatment centre on night shift and I love working out. How crazy awesome is this? I’m so happy in my life right now I even have clean laundry hung up and folded say whaaaaaaat? I know this is life changing but I’m happy and so is zilly

 I really miss blogging. I miss getting all the ideas out of my head and thrown into the blogisphere. I'm not even sure what  to write anymore. Today was pretty rad. It's Wednesday night hype on twitch. I watch my favourite happy hardcore dj's on wed. Weaver, Kutski, Daghardcore and Dj2bhappy, seatlehardcore. It's great. Nifty got me lights to set up for the event. I love them. He came by this morning after giving me a ride to work and we hung out. He told me last time he doesn't want a relationship with me and that's cool. I just don't get why guys don't want a relationship with me. I'm fucking amazing and cool and hot and rad. But at the same time I don't think I want a relationship. I kinda like being on my own and doing what ever I want with whoever I want whenever I want. My life has been pretty simple lately. I go skiing with Nikkei and Stephen and work and rave in my living room for wed night hype. I like my little life though. It works for me. For the first time I feel like I have control over what's going on in my life and I'm not on a roller coaster. I think it helps I have quit drinking since Aug. Sounds cliche but life is fuller now. Full of good things and less mistakes. I still make mistakes but they aren't smh wtf mistakes. I don't have as many mood swings either which has been a blessing. I also get more done. I'm more productive. I do miss drinking now and again But as a whole, it's been a good thing. 

Missing You Dave

I still have no idea where you disappeared to but I was listening to the cheese files and Roxette and both made me think of you. I hope where ever you are you are happy.

Hitting the reset button once again....

HJ and I broke up months and ago.I miss him and the kids but I'm actually ok with it. I wasn't at first of course but now that the dust is settling I'm letting go and getting back to normal. I'm craving change at work. I want so badly to move to Edmonton again. There's just so much more for me there. I'd miss my family and be further from the Mini One. But that would never stop me from driving further to see her all of the time still. I find myself doing more with my friends now. I try to get out a few times a week. Like this week I went to Weird Al with BisH and Frisbee Golfing with Sarah Pickle and Dalt yesterday. Then bowling with Daphne and her man tonight.

One of the reasons I want to blog tonight is because I'm worried about someone really close to me. She found out that she has lumps and they aren't the good lady lump kinda lumps. I'm putting on a brave face for her and I know my blog freaks her out and she doesn't read it so I don't mind writing about this. I'm terrified and scared of losing someone who means the world to me in more ways than one. She's been my rock for years. And now I'm faced with the idea that I might lose the one person who keeps me continually grounded with her rockness. I don't think I'm going to tell anyone about this except for all you people who read this which I don't think anyone does any more. But at least then it's out of my head and into some form of reality.

Gotta make the most out of the little life we're given. I have to say that I've found a new strength and am moving forwards. PS. counselling really helps a lot. Don't ever be ashamed to ask for help. And no matter what I'll always be there for any of you.

home sweet home

Finally back in my house. I missed it so much. I love it more than ever now. It feels good to have the boys here too. HJ and I have so many big plans for it. TILE TILE TILE sw00n. The boys love their big rooms and are happy to be so close to the skate park. Life is great. Just got our house warming prezzy from my mom two giant silver key coat hangers and a glitzy vase. I feel great I have a new car, new digs and amazing friends and family to celebrate this with. our dogs even love the new place with the super big back yard. I can't wait until we build the basement bedroom and then I can finally have a sewing room again.

Works been good home life is grand and we're looking forward to a trip to mexico this winter to watch my sister get married finally. I am itching to get back into sewing skirts. I love skirts and how girly they are which is far from what I am but I still love it.

I don't even know if anyone reads this anymore....I don't really care though I keep writing cuz it's for me.

Appreciation at its finest

Really appreciating life as it is in this moment.

I have supportive family, friends and Co workers. But most of all I have a super supportive man who has helped me grow as a person and been there for me through thick and thin. Thanks for being here through the thick right now. It hasn't been easy for you but just know I appreciate every gesture, every hug and every encouraging word along with the space I've needed to grieve. I love you hottie Josh with all my heart and guts. Xoxoxx

i feel better after posting this

sometimes i get so mad that i miss you at all now but mostly i'm just sad that things happened the way they did, this song came on the radio when i was driving yesterday and everything came pouring back into my mind. i doubt you read this and i doubt you feel that way too at times but i do. not often but once every few months your memory spills over into recognition.

Calgary Comic Expo

took the mini one to the calgary comic expo for her 10th birthday. we all dressed up as rainbow dash....even hottiejosh. best day of the year so far...many more to come. LOVE these two so much. <3 p="">

From here to there

Lots of things are going on. HJ and I are getting geared up to take the mini one to the Calgary comic expo where her and I will have matching rainbow dash hoodies tails and tutus! We're also cleaning up the yard getting ready for spring and summer. Just got a new bbq and he's teaching me the finer points in bbqing. He's so good to me. We're also getting ready to take the boys out hiking this year and true camping with fishing. We have a couple trips planned and things are looking up. Sure gonna beat last years spring/summer of chaos with my arm happenings. We're all looking forward to this summer. It's going to be epic!